Yesterday I cleaned Tessa's room.
Cleaning your childs room has got to be the worst job a mother has. I can remember when I was in elementary school - the days I would come home to find my mom in my bedroom, garbage bag in hand and with a look of disgust, rage and helplessness on her face...
I know what she felt like, now.
Back then I was just afraid. What had she thrown away? What had she found? Not that I made a habit of hiding things...but, you know...
Most importantly - what would my punishment be?
Usually it was just her yelling - a lot - about how disgusting I was. Maybe being grounded for a day or two. But my parents never used grounding much - it was as much punishment for them as it was for us.
I can remember one time - I think it was the last day of 6th grade - that I came home and found her just finished up from cleaning my room. On my bed was a sleeping bag. It was to be my bedding for the summer. The new theme for my room was minimalist - there was nothing, anywhere, that could hide dirt, grime or garbage.
By the time I reached middle school I was an excellent cleaner. I don't think my mom ever had to clean my room again. Becki wasn't nearly as smart as I was, she was messy, dirty, filthy almost until she moved out. I can recall my moms scary cleaning sessions in her room clear until after I left for college. The interesting thing is that now Becki's quite the neat freak. We both are, my mom pounded that into our heads. Without her ever saying it I somehow knew - 'cleanliness is next to godliness', lol.
Anyway - back to Tessa.
I cleaned her room for her until she was about 5. She learned to pick up her toys early and would help put things away by the time she was about 2, but I did all the cleaning, of course. At 5, I gave her more responsibility, taught her how to make her bed, etc. I also made sure there was a place for everything, so it wasn't too hard for her to put things away. At 5.5 I stopped helping her every time her room needed to be cleaned, instead I started to clean it for her just once every couple of months, giving her a clean slate to maintain.
So yesterday was the day I cleaned for her. I figured it was a good time, with Christmas coming up, she'd need a place to put all her new stuff!
I expected it to take me an hour or so.
Nope.
I started before 1:00. I finished after 4:00.
She could, quite possibly, be the naughtiest child that ever lived.
There was pencil all over everything. She's not even supposed to have a pencil in her room! I found it at the very end - the one thing that was put away - tucked into a drawer in her side table. Nice a sharp. Perfect for writing all over the walls, her bed, her dollhouse, her barbies...
We have a small artificial tree that I let her have in her room. It has ornaments on it that she's made and that we've bought for her. A Cinderella one, a Dora one, a bunch of salt dough ones that she painted, etc.
There was one glass one that she painted in preschool. I found it, broken into a hundred pieces and shoved under her bed. I have no idea how she got it there without cutting her hands. Several ornaments were broken, all of them under the bed. She's had the tree in her bed since Sunday night. In less than 4 days (during which she was in school!) she managed to destroy half a dozen Christmas ornaments. I can't figure out why. Maybe it was in protest to the commercialism of the holiday? She did recently tell me Christmas is not about presents or decorations...
She's obsessed with tape. Any kind will do, but recently she stole a roll of clear scotch tape from the junk drawer in the kitchen. With it she boarded up all the windows and doors of her dollhouse. Incredibly strange. The little people inside could see out (as the tape was clear) but they were totally barricaded and impervious to attack.
She had also swiped about a million of the small hair elastics I use in her hair. Every barbie or dollhouse doll she had was sporting at least 30 of them, in various fashions. Here's my favorite. I didn't think to take a picture of this girl until I had about 2/3 of her elastics removed. Originally she was wearing a strapless, knee length rubber band gown. Creative, even if it was a major pain in the ass to remove.
Luckily she had a play date after school yesterday and wasn't home until 5:30. I had plenty of time to cool off by then. I didn't even yell at her, though I did try to impress upon her how truly disgusting she is. I don't think it worked. She just doesn't have any fear of me! Too many empty threats, I suppose. I would have yelled, but I figured it wasn't worth getting myself worked up over.
I'm not quite sure what to do. I thought 6 was old enough to keep her room clean, but maybe I'm expecting too much from her?
Hopefully she'll grow out of it earlier, like I did, rather than later, like Becki did.
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